Ever feel like your love life is a broken record, repeating the same relationship mistakes over and over again? There’s a reason for that, buried deep in patterns called “schemas”—and clinical psychologist Petra Vágyi is tackling exactly this issue in her upcoming seminar in Budapest (Budapest) on October 18, 2025. Her insights promise a wake-up call for anyone tired of falling for the same types or sabotaging their own happiness.
How Relationship Schemas Mess With Us
These stubborn, unhealthy patterns—relationship schemas—can sneakily trap us into making poor choices or getting stuck in unhappy relationships. Vágyi explains how these patterns often kick in like an automatic “red button” every time we face familiar emotional situations. Instead of stopping to reconsider, we spiral down the same path of thoughts and feelings, often without even realizing it.
Here’s the catch: these schemas usually take root in our childhood or teenage years, especially if our basic needs weren’t fully met. The way we were treated (or not treated) while growing up distorts our sense of self and our expectations of relationships. What once protected us as children turns into a roadblock in adulthood, causing us to relive the same dramas—no matter how many times we promise ourselves to do things differently.
Schema Therapy: Spotting and Changing the Script
The key to schema therapy is self-awareness. It doesn’t just point out these painful cycles—it gets to the core beliefs and automatic reactions that keep us stuck. By recognizing what we really need now (not what our six-year-old selves needed), we start to take control and change direction. Vágyi’s approach brings past and present feelings together, showing how they’re linked in our behaviors today.
She illustrates this with real-life stories, making these hidden patterns so clear you’ll probably start recognizing your own in the middle of the lecture. The goal? To help us step away from old scripts and into healthier, more satisfying relationships, all by strengthening our ‘healthy adult self.’ With practice, you become better at noticing when a schema is in control—and turning it off.
Who’s Behind All This?
Petra Vágyi isn’t just a therapist; she’s trained and certified by the ISST, has taught medical psychology at the University of Debrecen (DOTE, Debreceni Orvostudományi Egyetem), and has written essential books like “Trapped by Schemas – How to Break Free from Repetition” (“Sémáink fogságában – Hogyan lépjünk ki az ismétlődő forgatókönyvekből?” in Hungarian) and “Our Schemas in Love – Tracing Relationship Problems and Dating Difficulties” (“Sémáink párban – A párkapcsolati problémák és a pártalálási nehézségek nyomában” in Hungarian). Her work emphasizes uncovering the reasons behind our choices, not just covering up bad behavior.
The October seminar runs from 5:00 to 6:30 PM in Budapest (Budapest). Tickets are just $14. Vágyi’s sessions aren’t just for couples—they’re for anyone who wants to break free from old relationship mistakes for good.
